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Jessica Simpson Will Get Naked For The Right Movie Role. Will Papa Joe Disown Her, Too? 12.Dec.2007

Is this all you care about? At this rate it's going to be a very quiet Christmas at the Simpson family home. It's questionable whether Ashlee will show up, since Papa Joe banned her boyfriend, Pete, from coming because of a little boy kissing. Such a progressive father - he's got no problem shamelessly whoring and manipulating his children for profit, though.

Papa may be just finding out about Jessica's latest career strategy. Desperate to land a successful role in film, Jessica is said to be vying for a role which will require full-frontal nudity. Jess is convinced she will finally be taken seriously as an actress if she bares it all. Huh. Interesting logic.

Papa ain't gonna like that none. He made Jessica turn down a role as a porn star (Jenna Jameson? !? ) earlier this year because of the nudity. At the time he said, "We were promised we would win an Oscar with that. I told them, 'I think we'll just buy a statue of a little man and keep our clothes on.'" We? Nobody's talking about you getting naked, Papa Joe. Maybe Jess should buy a little statue of a man with a fake tan and a Hawaiian shirt and name it Daddy. She can say, "Yes, Daddy," all day long as she takes it all off for all the wrong reasons.

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