Avril is French for dirty little skank who likes to spit on peopleShe probably hasn't washed them for a few years anyway.
So who knew Avril had boobies like that? Certainly not her husband, Deryk Whibley, who she keeps in a cupboard under the stairs. Are they new? Did she buy a Wonderbra? Or ... oh, no. Don't say she's pregnant. Can you imagine a little Lavigne-Whibley garden gnome, running around in a wife beater and rep tie? For God's sake, I hope they're using birth control.
Avril has been laboring to overcome the latest blow to her image, that being the lawsuit against her for plagiarizing some nobody's song to make her hit "Girlfriend". Apparently this is more damaging to her psyche than being called a nasty little pig who spits on people just trying to earn a living. Don't want your picture taken? Stay home. Nobody will miss you anyway.
For those of you outside the metropolitan New York area, I've got news for you. Avril is a fibber. OK, she's an outright liar. She's been known to party it up in club bathrooms for a while now - as a matter of fact, I believe that's how she met her husband, trading rails in the loo - but she'll be the first one to say she never does drugs and never has. Yeah, right. I really want to believe that ... I do, but when I heard the DJ's laughing on air about how she got lost in the men's room for half an hour and came out looking wildly invigorated, I just shook my head. Some people never learn.