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Have You Kissed Your Bodyguard Today? Kate Gosselin Did - And Then She Paid Him 20.Sep.2010

DAMMIT, WE ARE NOT CASH MACHINES!!Good ol' Steve the bodyguard, Kate Gosselin's protector, her Rock of Gibraltar ... her very married, hurly-burly salt-and-pepper dude with the 'tude. He's very good at keeping his lady's unwanted attention at arm's length; perhaps he should practice what he preaches.

According to the Chicago Sun Times, Kate and Steve were doing a whole helluva lot more than just a photo shoot in sunny Mexico: They were SMOOCHING. That's right. Not canoodling. Not necking. Not even making out, but SMOOCHING. Jesus, Joseph and Mary the carpenter, what has the world come to when a woman who can shoot out babies like a tennis ball machine can't even SMOOCH the hired help on an exotic beach while his wife and her eight children are thousands of miles away? !?

Of course, this is all hearsay. No one actually took any pictures of this alleged SMOOCHING. (We probably couldn't post them here anyway; God knows where their hands were in all this.) And there could be a perfectly innocent explanation for all of this, but I'm not buying it. Kate Gosselin has been a master at spinning the seediest parts of her marriage off on her ex, but she's no saint. Hell, she married him and mass-produced with him, didn't she? The way I see it, she's no better than Jon, Octo-Mom or any of the other baby whores.