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Jon And Kate Both Fornicate - Just Not With Each Other Anymore 11.May.2009

At opposite endsThat Jon is a stupid man. I don't watch Jon and Kate Plus 8. Frankly I'd rather soak in skunk piss than watch reality TV, especially shows that exploit children. But from what I've heard, Jon is just a sperm tank and whipping boy for his incredibly evil wife - even my grandmother won't watch the show anymore because of Kate's pit viper personality.

Kate is working hard to rise above her husband's fame, touring the talk shows to plug her latest book. I'm sure it was ghost-written; surely a woman who likes sex as much as this woman must have liked it wouldn't have much spare time. But apparently free time she had, if you believe some sources.

While the media has been obsessed with Jon's alleged lapse in judgment, another story has been nibbling at the edges, one that claims it was Kate who strayed first, sexing it up with a personal trainer and a bodyguard. Guess she likes 'em beefy. These sources (most likely Jon's friends and/or family) suggest that Jon only cheated after Kate came home smelling like tube steak.

Whatever the case, Kate is doing her book tour alone, although she did allow a statement from Jon to be read on the Today show. That's big of her. Maybe he'll let her release a statement after the sex tape leaks.