Like watching Star and Big Gay AlGive it up, Ryan. Nobody believed it the first time you tried to pretend to be a healthy hetero male. Maybe it was the fault of your accomplice. Accomplished actress that she is (ahem!) she simply couldn't make it look very warm or passionate. Or believable even.
For some reason Ryan felt the need to assert his sexuality again, even after his true desires surged to the surface. There's something about a man in uniform that just drives Ryan wild! Maybe that's what he's thinking of here, because we all know that girl isn't doing it for him.
Something else that gets Ryan wild is making lots of money. He's been plugging Denise Richards' new reality show every chance he gets, even doing a phone-in chat with her earlier this week. There's just one little problem with that: Ryan's production company is making the show, which means Ryan's making a pile of money on it, and he should mention that when he's promoting it. Maybe he knows it's going to suck and he's just taking his check and going home. And not with that brunette.