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Avril Lavigne Files For Divorce, Dumping Her Hobbit For Pineapple Boy 14.Oct.2009

Will be a big hit with the country club setYes, but will Pineapple Boy fit under the stairs like Deryk did? And what does this mean for Greasy Bear?

Skanky punk wannabe Avril Lavigne has finally made it official, filing for divorce on the universal grounds of "irreconcilable differences". It's no surprise to anyone - rumor had it that Deryk wanted to settle down and start a family. Avril, on the other hand, only wanted to party, party, party. With everybody but her grizzled little husband.

Not one to waste time, Avril has already found a new beau: Dole Foods heir Justin Murdock. Unlike Avril's rebound hookup, Brandon Davis, Murdock is a billionaire. The pair are still keeping it quiet, but reportedly have vacationed in Hawaii together. It's hard to see what a nice guy from a good family could see in a slag like Avril, but maybe he's just going through a rebellious phase.