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Jennifer Aniston Pregnant With John Mayer's Baby? Watch Out For Flying Pigs! 20.Oct.2008

When do I get paid? Will she stop at nothing to sell her loser movies? She's got three lined up for release this fall; you know they'll all be stinkers. Besides, after Angelina's confession that she fell in love with Brad during the filming of Mr. and Mrs. Smith you know she had to "leak" the old pregnant baloney again.

She tried to hook up with bigger names - DiCaprio and Butler - but despite pathetic attempts to fan a non-existent fire, they turned up their noses. Probably because they couldn't find their way around that big, manly chin.

So suddenly she and John are back together. Mr. Foot-Long, who months ago said he just wasn't that into her, has had a change of heart. He's a changed man! He's ready for commitment! Please. He just wants his picture back in the tabloids. Is he going to join her on her promotional tours like she joined him? Not likely. Just because they spent the night at his house instead of hers doesn't mean anything except he wanted to get her away from Norman. After what Daisy did to him, he just doesn't trust dogs.