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Lohan On The Lam, On A Rampage And Anything Else She Can Get Her Hands On 14.Mar.2009

I don't need a pish test. I'm shober. I shwear.And that's probably where the problem lies. As f**ked up as she's looked lately, she probably flunked a drug test. Hell, she probably broke the damn thing.

Whatever the offense, the Beverly Hills PD has issued a warrant for her arrest. They've also issued a press release that said, "In response to media inquiries, [the] Beverly Hills Police Department is confirming a warrant was in fact issued for the arrest of Lindsay Lohan ... It is our hope that Miss Lohan will surrender herself so that this matter will be resolved in a timely manner." Yeah, good luck with that.

Lindsay, who of course denies such a warrant even exists, spent the entire afternoon barricaded in Sam's house. Not content to hide quietly, however, she proceeded to fight with Sam, yelling, screaming, even breaking a window. The cops were called, and they even tried knocking on the door, but the girls wouldn't answer. The cops left the property, but it was reported that they stationed a car down the block in case Lindsay tried to leave.

And so the meltdown begins. Lindsay's piece of shit father typically took the opportunity to bash Sam but professed ignorance about Lindsay's sobriety or the lack thereof. Where's White Oprah when we need her? Hell, where's Blair Berk? She's not representing her anymore; maybe she got sick of getting stiffed.

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