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Brokeback Xenu: All The Barley Milk In The World Can't Make Cruise And Travolta Cowboys 06.Apr.2009

Brokeback barley milkersHollywood really needs to get off the remake wagon. Some things are better left alone, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid being a prime example. Nobody could replace Redford and Newman. Nobody.

Only a delusional egomaniac with his own pet church and film studio would even think of remaking that classic. And only a man who wears a corset and elevator shoes would dare to walk in the late great Paul Newman's or Robert Redford's shoes. You don't see Brad Pitt or the Clooney stepping up, just another middle-aged Scientologist looking to relive his glory days.

Little man Cruise is reportedly going to take what's left of United Artists (what he hasn't already ruined) and throw together a half-assed remake of the beloved Western. Now all he has to do is cast Madonna in the girlfriend role played by Katharine Ross and he'll have another Heaven's Gate on his hands.