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Dropout Piven Even Worse Than Everyone Thought, Will Be Examined By Investors' Doctors 21.Dec.2008

Too high to eat the cakeAnd when I say worse than everyone thought, I'm not talking about his phony-baloney mercury poisoning story. He's been trying to bail on his commitment to Speed the Plow for weeks now, and has left a trail of slime everywhere he's gone.

The Piven shouldn't be too quick to curl up with a few lines ... of script, that is. The people who put their money up to make the show are furious, and are not about to let him go peacefully. According to some sources, these folks have "recourse to have Jeremy examined by another doctor, and we are going to exercise that". One investor even went so far as to say, "We didn't have star insurance, but we should have had asshole insurance".

The shoe does seem to fit. The Piven was reportedly scouting for his replacement weeks ago, calling actor friends and casting directors asking if they knew anyone who could step in. Was that supposed to ease the blow? He told his friends he was "bored out of his mind", and even started showing up late for shows. He's not kidding anybody; the show obviously got in the way of his partying.

The sushi industry is said to be in an uproar over The Piven's besmirching of their beloved tuna. He might find a hard time getting a table at Nobu here on in. (Actually, they probably could care less. He was reportedly difficult to please and a lousy tipper.)