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Beyonce Pulls A Diva Fit On Secret Service, But Blows Us All Away With "at Last" 22.Jan.2009

I am not a Beyonce fan, but I will admit the girl can sing. She may not be able to shave promptly or tape her boobies securely, but she's got some serious pipes. And so I thought it was fitting that she serenade the new Mr. and Mrs. President in their first dance with Etta James' At Last. It's a beautiful song, and perfect for the occasion.

But Jay's little woman was not on her best behavior Monday night. She and Jay-Z found themselves in dire straits when they left his rehearsal only to find that cops had closed the streets around the theater and they'd have to walk FOUR WHOLE BLOCKS in the freezing cold to their car. Miss B was like, uh-uh, I ain't havin' that. In all fairness, she wasn't dressed for it. For those not in the Northeast, let me say that it's been bitterly cold this winter. As a matter of fact, it was so cold that Jay-Z couldn't leave his handprints in cement for the theater as he'd promised - because the cement froze. Still, if it were you or I that pitched a bitch in the street like that, we'd be watching the inauguration from Cellblock 7.

But Beyonce is not like you and I; she's got scads of money falling out her ass, so the cops made the exception and let their driver through the blockade. And she went on to be a part of history, all without making the kinds of moves she made here. Good thing, too. A girl's gotta know there's a time and a place for everything.