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Ryan Reynolds To Be New Green Hornet. Timberlake Too Busy Ditching Biel, Cooper Too Busy Swapping Spinsters 12.Jul.2009

It was a victory by default, really. I mean, we don't have to worry about him getting knocked up - he and Scarlett have already made up their minds to adopt. That way he won't ruin his figure.

It was with great relief that Hollywood learned who won the war for the most coveted superhero role since Underdog: the Green Hornet. The biggest buzz was over little man Timberlake, who is just too effeminate to play in tights like that. The Biel would have filled out that codpiece better anyway.

Bradley Cooper was also rumored to be in the running. Unfortunately he won't have time with all the running he's already doing - from Maniston to Squinty to ... who knows. I mean, he's kinda cute and all, but he's certainly no Pitt or Clooney. Then again, who is?

Perhaps Mr. Johansson can fill those shoes. He's certainly not hard to look at, with a body like that. I have yet to watch any of his movies, but I can content myself with his pictures. He'd probably look pretty good in green, and can buzz around my flower any time.