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Holly Madsen: What Do You Give A Girl Who's Got Everything ... But A Clue? 22.Jun.2007

Holly is one of Hugh Hefner's three (yes, three) girlfriends. Dude is 80 freakin' years old. Do they make Viagra that strong? Aren't they worried he'll hurt himself? I mean, really. 80!

But I digress. So Hef's got three girlfriends, and they don't always get along. Any time you have a bunch of women living in close quarters there's going to be issues. It just is - don't ask why. In this case, there is a lead, or dominant, girlfriend - that would be Holly. She's the uptight, insecure looking one on the left.

Does she get to be # 1 because she's oldest?

Holly has decided she's ready to start a family, and wants to settle down and have Hef's baby(ies). She also feels like when it is that time, the other two just have to go - it wouldn't be right having them around, cheap labor be damned. She can hire some ugly nannies and not have to worry. Or better yet, male nannies. That's the ticket.

Someone needs to give Holly a little nudge, let her know that's not how Hef operates. He's been doing the multiple revolving partner thing for a couple hundred years now, and his stripes are set in: no amount of scrubbing will get them out. Holly, if you like living in the Mansion, you have to play by the man's rules. If you don't want to, there only thousands of other young women who would literally do anything to warm your spot on the round revolving bed.