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Madonna To Present Baby Jesus At Oscar Parties, But His Real Grandma Wants Him Back 20.Feb.2009

Doesn't have a thing to wearFor the record, Grandma Luz and Granny Gristle are the same age. The real grandma thinks the plastic one has kidnapped her pretty little puto and is holding him hostage. Right.

Remember A-Rod? A-Rod who? Why put up with a lying, womanizing roid head when you can have sweet baby Jesus, freshly squeezed and never been juiced? She's not in it for the long term, people - she's just getting hot sex while she still can.

Rumor has it that Madge is going to drag her wee little boy toy to the Oscar parties this weekend. Will she have him on a leash, or will she just continue to drag him around by the dick? Not to worry about him, though; he doesn't mind any of this. He's cashing in as fast as his little hips can pump him and ignoring everyone else. He says to tell his abuelita he'll be home in time for Christmas - with lots of presents. For himself.