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Starbucks In Financial Trouble, Cannot Survive Without Help Of Britney And Olsen Twins 08.Jul.2008

Last known sighting, circa Jamie Lynn's laborReally, when was the last time you saw a mob of paps at Starbucks? Since Britney's dad has reined her in, she's only been able to squeak in a jumbo vente latte or whatever you call them. I don't drink coffee, and certainly wouldn't spend six dollars on just one cup. I can get at least two Red Bulls for six bucks!

Now that pickings have gotten slim for the paparazzi, they've had to resort to extreme measures. They're even carpooling! And they're not the only ones affected by Britney's home confinement.

Starbucks recently announced they're closing 500 stores and laying off God knows how many employees. If Jamie Spears had just let Britney keep making those five or six Starbucks runs each day this never would have happened. Of course she'd be about 800 lbs. by now, but at least the baristas would still be working. Same goes for Ashley and Mary Kate; they must have hired a full-time frappe pourer. You never see them on the street juggling two cups, a pack of cigarettes and a Blackberry anymore.