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The Clooney Really Misses Me. I Can Just Tell 13.Oct.2008

I wonder if it ticklesI miss you, too, baby. I've got the sex ramp all shined up and I'm just waiting for your call. Because I know you will.

Poor George has had to ugly down for his latest role. He's had to hide his irresistible manliness behind that horror of horrors ... the porn stache.

Ron Jeremy made it famous, but others have rocked the look, albeit for different reasons. Orlando Bloom sported a jaunty little porn stache so lady friends would stop asking him to prove his age. Even the repulsive Mike Tyson has been spotted with one. Why do guys think that looks good?

Until that time he can shed that stache, George will have to pretend to suffer greatly for his art. But I know the real truth. The Clooney is hot sex incarnate. He'll have to do better than that to get a good night's sleep. I'm still waiting ... and I know what you like, George. Pick up the phone.