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Jessica Alba Still Feels Like A Social Misfit, Should Have Listened To The Girl Behind Her 18.Feb.2008

What are you trying to say? If she had, she wouldn't be in this mess. Alba has no idea what she's talking about. This whole pregnancy thing has really knocked her for a loop. One minute she's an American, dammit, an American. The next, she's Latina and proud of it, and plans to speak only Spanish when at home with her child, even though she doesn't know the language. That's OK, it's not like she's planning to be a hands-on mommy.

And whatever will she do with her itinerant layabout babydaddy, Cash Warren? Has she made him get a job? He hasn't been seen carrying her shopping bags or waiting outside the gym for her to come out and give him quarters for the parking meter. If her car gets ticketed there will be hell to pay. He knows this.

Since announcing her pregnancy, Jessica has taken great pains to stay in shape, working out in the gym like a madwoman. She'll need to get back into swimsuit-shape quickly, as that's the only way she can make any real money. Cash has grown accustomed to his lifestyle, and if she doesn't want him to stray again, she'd better keep him happy.