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Kate Hudson Dumps Owen Wilson For One-nut Bike Boy 17.May.2008

Pretty only on the outside We all knew this would happen. Owen's suicide attempt last year was said to be a direct result of being dumped by Kate. He takes some time off, gets his shit together, and what does he do? He goes back to the poisonous womb for some more. And she dumped him again! Everyone knew she would ... everyone but Owen, who was said to be taking it very hard. No duh.

And so who did our toxic little twinkie decide to favor next? Why, none other than Tour de France champ Lance Armstrong, an athlete so gifted he can cycle on only one testicle. The guy who broke Sheryl Crow's heart. And yes, the guy who hooked up with an Olsen twin half his age.

Friends and family have rallied to support our beloved Butterscotch Stallion during his time of heartbreak. And Kate? Hopefully she'll get her just desserts with Lance, who is just as much of a user as she is.