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Nicole Richie Knows How To Throw A Party. All 83 Pounds Of Her. 29.May.2007

Does the inside match the outside? Wow. That's about as hot as a turnip in a dirty gym sock.

Say hello to the face of self-starvation - ano queen Nicole Richie, currently weighing in (ooh, don't say "weigh") at a piddling 83 pounds. At least she hasn't lost her sense of humor.

Invitees to Nicole and Mischa's Memorial Day bash were treated to some of Nicole's painful poetry via email, asking their friends to join them in getting blind drunk to celebrate a holiday whose meaning "we have no f***ing clue". Lionel and Brenda, are you proud yet?

Most troubling, the invitation ends with a note that "There will be a scale at the front door. No girls over 100 lbs. allowed in. Start starving yourself now." While I think/hope that Nicole is just being sarcastic, according to Dr. Joyce Brothers, this is her way of thumbing her nose at rehab. "It's a huge form of acting out, and it shows that treatment for her eating disorder didn't do any good."

Don't let that belly pooch fool you - that's just a little malnutrition rearing its ugly head. Do you think her hair has started to fall out yet?