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Nothing Will Make Larry David Happy. Just The Thought Pisses Him Off. 27.Sep.2007

You'd think Larry would be jumping for joy, but he's got an image to keep. Besides, if he were to admit it Laurie might come back just to spite him. He'd rather let the pool boy keep her.

Unhappy then, unhappier now.

OK, so maybe it wasn't the pool boy. It was the contractor Larry undoubtedly paid thousands of dollars to renovate their Martha's Vineyard estate. His then-wife, Laurie, discovered she liked to help said contractor hold his tool, and ran off with him. Talk about a blessing in disguise. Since he pried her from his house and home, Larry has been a new man, according to Page Six. Their inside source says that since Laurie flew the coop, Larry is "so happy. It's like a weight has been lifted off of his shoulders." Sound cruel? You don't know Laurie, and even those who do know her don't want to anymore.

Laurie produced "An Inconvenient Truth", Al Gore's Oscar-winning documentary about global warming. When she's not preaching eco-babble (and it's only -babble because she doesn't practice it), Laurie toots around in private jets between her mammoth fossil-burning homes. She probably drives a Hummer, too. She's such an obnoxious bitch that even Sheryl Crow, who took a cross-country bus trip with her earlier this year, won't give her the time of day. Larry, however, seems to be taking it all in stride. When questioned about his alleged bliss, Larry said, "I defy anyone to produce any evidence that the word happy has ever crossed my lips. I am not now, nor have I ever been, 'happy'."