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Belts are for whuppin, y'allUnless Britney's ass crack starts at the back of her knees, I think it's safe to say someone's big ass was hanging out in Beverly Hills today. At least the paps had the decency not to shoot it. They must have just had lunch.

Today it's official: Britney and K-Fed are finally divorced. Some terms of the divorce were disclosed, but lawyers got the judge to agree to keep most of the details under wraps. Surprisingly, custody is still said to be 50/50, although in light of Britney's recent instability, I wouldn't be shocked to see them back in court within the next month or so - if it even takes that long.

Britney doesn't seem to be too starved for love - she's been seen out and about with a local real estate agent named Justin lately. Expect to see his story in lurid detail in News of the World by the end of summer. Everybody dumps Britney. Is it her, or the company she keeps? Perhaps it's something in the genes. Britney's estranged mother, Lynne, was said to have rushed to Vegas last week, and of course we all assumed she was there to rescue her daughter from herself, because that's what Britney so desperately needs. Nope. Mama Spears was partying up a storm herself this weekend, all too eager to confirm what we've all suspected for years: Lynne Spears is more like Dina Lohan than she's willing to admit. I hear she's got her hands full with the little sister, though - the Enquirer is reporting that Jamie Lynn thought she was pregnant recently, and Lynne was offended because she told Britney first. Ah, the irony of it all.