Mommy can't help you nowHow will she ever get through all this hubris without:
a) going to jail
b) overdosing
c) overdosing in jail (hey, she partied in rehab)
d) losing everything and end up working Sunset and Vine
The coke whore next to her in the picture is the biggest reason she is where she is right now. Hell, she probably gave Lindsay the first drink and line of blow at her birthday party. Hey, as long as her baby is partying, so can she. Mama Lohan only likes to ... ahem, blow her daughter's money, not her own. Besides, according to Dina (enabling gutter wench that she is), she's on the phone with and texting Lindsay "constantly". Um, sure.
Help won't be coming from her deadbeat dad, either. The Lohan Anti-Parents had a court date today, at which Michael was chided for not paying child support. Are you kidding me? I mean, come on. He just got out of jail. He's been trying to start a church/rehab type of thing out in the Hamptons. He's been trying desperately to help his daughter. He hasn't had time to look for a job. Douche probably hasn't worked a legit job in ten years - he didn't have to. That's what Lindsay was for.
Anyway, about the carjacking. The guys in the white Denali Lindsay was arrested for DUI-ing in say she took the truck and held them hostage while she chased her former assistant at speeds up to 100 mph. Three big guys say the little cokehead overpowered them and wouldn't let them out. Of course now they're demanding some kind of compensation for their horrible ordeal. Better hit her up quick, guys. At this rate she'll be a bankrupt has-been by January.
